


On The Way Down

by kmou



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Drama, M/M, Male Slash, Romance, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-08-19
Updated: 2004-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-16 14:27:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29951331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kmou/pseuds/kmou
Summary: A songfic of Draco's POV (point of view) about Harry and him.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter





	On The Way Down

**Author's Note:**

> The song is Ryan Cabrera's "On The Way Down".
> 
> Thank you Annie for beta-ing this story. :)

_Sick and tired of this world  
_ _There's no more air  
_ _Trippin' over myself  
_ _Goin' nowhere  
_ _Waiting  
_ _Suffocating  
_ _No direction  
_ _And I took a dive_

I had nothing going for me. Everything was planned for me before my birth. It was all laid out. My father was the puppet master and I was his puppet. I was nothing to him because I was not worthy to be called a Malfoy. I didn't see things his way. I didn't want to insult people name-calling. I didn't want to act all superior. I didn't want ANY of the things that he wanted for me, what he expected of me. I wanted to be myself but that was just not possible. I was too weak, unable to stand alone against my father... against the Dark Lord... against my house. I let them all control me.

I had tried to kill myself a couple of times. Did you know that? The cool blade was against my warm wrist, I watching the color of crimson roses erupt, and fall like a waterfall. A vial of the Draught of the Living Death potion was in my hand, the liquid flowed past my lips, taking me into the darkness. The wand that was bonded to me, pointed towards my heart and the whispered words _"Avada Kedavra"_ rolled off my tongue. But my attempts at ending my life were always ruined. My father bursting in, my housemates and their _"Expelliarmus"_ screams, the house elves watching me constantly...

I had nothing going for me but then you came crashing into my world, like the bloody Gryffindor you are, like the bloody HERO you are. I laugh every time I remember you and your brave words: _"I will save you"_. Could you really? Could you really save me from my fate? Could you protect me from my father? Could you keep the Dark Lord from placing the dark mark on my arm? Could you take me away from the evil that is threatening to take me, threatening to swallow me whole? Swallow me alive? Could you save me from the darkness that is within me?

_And on the way down  
_ _I saw you  
_ _And you saved me  
_ _From myself  
_ _And I won't forget  
_ _The way you loved me  
_ _On the way down  
_ _Almost fell right through  
_ _But I held onto you_

You found me by the tree, on the grass, facing the lake, and just sat down that day in the spring. Did you even know what you were getting yourself into? You sat down, smiled at me, said _"Hello"_ , and offered me a chocolate frog as if nothing had ever happened between us since our first-year. I remember you sputtered a laugh in my face when I asked, _"Who are you and what have you done to Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived?"_ You kept trying to talk to me every since that day. No matter how many times I told you to sod off, you stayed with me, talking to me. You lent me a shoulder when I didn't want it. You listened when I didn't want you to. You were there when I didn't want you there.

_I've been wondering why  
_ _It's only me  
_ _Have you always been inside  
_ _Waiting to breathe  
_ _It's alright  
_ _Sunlight  
_ _On my face  
_ _I wake up and yeah, I'm alive_

It took us... no. It took _ME_ weeks to get used to you. It took _me_ weeks to understand you. It took _me_ weeks to understand why you were trying to be my friend. You didn't care about what your friends thought; you only cared of what I thought. I remember wishing that I was as strong as you. I remember wishing that I was as carefree about what my friends thought of me. I remembered wishing if I could understand you and your words, and your ways that crawled under my skin that reached past my flesh and bones straight to my heart. I remembered wishing if I could take some of that pain you had inside you.

_'Cause on the way down  
_ _I saw you  
_ _And you saved me  
_ _From myself  
_ _And I won't forget  
_ _The way you loved me  
_ _On the way down  
_ _Almost fell right through  
_ _But I held onto you_

_"I love you Draco Malfoy, forever and always..."_ I remembered wishing I could show the same amount of love as you showed me. _"Harry, I-... I-I..."_ You pressed your fingers against my lips. _"Shhhh... I know"_ you said with a smile and a nod. How you managed to love me during these dark times was beyond me. Don't you remember all the pain I caused you and your friends? How can you still manage to love me? It's amazing how much love is in you when you are so dark.

I never even knew I loved you till I felt your arms around me, bringing me closer to you. Your warm hand on my cheek. The thumb rubbing the side of my face. The other arm around my waist. My arm around your neck. The other pressed against your back. Your chest against mine. I never even knew I loved you till you kissed me that rainy day in the fall, under the tree, on the grass, facing the lake. Your soft lips pressed up against mine. The sexy tongue of yours sneaking past my lips to stroke mine in a gentle caress. When your lips left mine, there was nothing but our breaths against each other's faces, our arms wrapped around each other, and our eyes gazing into each other- losing ourselves in them. I never even knew.

_I was so afraid  
_ _Of going under  
_ _But now  
_ _The weight of the world  
_ _Feels like nothing, no, nothing_

We spent every waking moment together, when we were not in class or on the Quidditch pitch. We spent holidays together. We even spent our morning naps and nights together. We shared our cloth- no... _**I**_ shared my clothes with you. We shared our food together. We shared our secrets, our thoughts, and our feelings together. We shared everything together. What was mine was yours and what was yours was mine. I never felt such kindness before. No one has ever treated me the way you have treated me. When we were together, everything seemed to disappear. Nothing existed. There was no war coming. There was no Voldemort and his Death Eaters. There was no Lucius Malfoy and the Malfoy family line. There was no Professor Severus Snape or Professor Dumbledore. There was no Slytherins, Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs, or Ravenclaws. There was no magic. There was even no Hogwarts. There was only just us.

_Down, down, down  
_ _You're all I wanted  
_ _Down, down, down  
_ _You're all I needed  
_ _Down, down, down  
_ _You're all I wanted  
_ _You're all I needed_

I would come to you whenever I needed you. I would come to you whenever I needed comfort, whenever I needed a shoulder, whenever I needed an ear, whenever I needed someone. I didn't even realize that when we were apart, I would cry out your name in my sleep. I didn't even realize that I would come running to you whenever I heard exciting or horrible news. I didn't realize that I was falling for you and _hard_. I didn't realize that you were worming yourself into my heart. I didn't realize that all I thought about was you. I didn't even realize I was buying Gryffindor-colored clothing or realize drawing that scar of yours on my parchment during classes.

_And I won't forget the way you loved me_

I never loved anyone like I loved you. You were the first. Somehow you made everything painful in my life go away. You brought nothing but happiness and light into my life. I remember when you grabbed me in the hallways, pulled me into an empty classroom or closet, and gave me the snog of my life. I remember how your fingers loved to play with my hair. Your hands were burning on my body, your body next to mine. Your lips on mine. Your tongue everywhere. Your scent wrapped around me. No one showed me such love.

_All that I wanted  
_ _All that I needed_

When I was younger, I would spend my nights waiting for something, someone. Waiting for someone to take me away from everything. I wished and wished for someone to show me a different life. I waited and waited, and soon gave up all hope. But since that day in the fall, under the tree, on the grass, facing the lake, I realized that you were that someone. You were the one I was waiting for, to take me away. You were that person I wished every night for. You were the person I prayed to the stars for.

_On the way down  
_ _I saw you  
_ _And you saved me  
_ _From myself  
_ _And I won't forget  
_ _The way you loved me  
_ _On the way down  
_ _I almost fell right through  
_ _But I held onto you_

_"I will save you,"_ you said... and you did save me. And you did rescue me. You stood by me when my father disowned me. You stood by me when your two best friends disapproved of our friendship, and then our relationship. You stood by me when your house turned its back on you. You stood by me when Voldemort threatened to take me under his wing. You stood by me through everything.

_Down, down, down  
_ _But I held onto you  
_ _Down, down, down_

Now it's time for me to save you. It's my time for me to show you my love for you. Time to kiss you under that tree, on the grass, facing the lake. Time for me to wrap my arms around you. Time for me to stand by you when my house turns its back on me. Time for me to stand by you when Voldemort comes. Time for me to stand by you when your friends no longer recognize you as their friend. Time for me to stand by you in this war. Time for me to just stand by you through everything like you did with me.

I love you. I truly love you. I hope you know that. I know I should say it more often, and I will. I promise to stay truthful to you and love you for the rest of my life. I promise to stay yours forever. I promise you many rainy days, kissing under the tree, on the grass, facing the lake. I promise you everything I have to offer. I've been waiting for this day for so long. I've been holding onto this for about two weeks already. When I walked into that store and looked around, this was the only thing that captivated me and reminded me of us.

Do you remember that today is our anniversary? Today is when you first kissed me... and today will be the day I get down on my knees and propose to you under the tree, on the grass, facing the lake. Today will be the day I profess my love for you forever. Today will be the day we both become engaged. Today will be the day you soon become Harry James Potter-Malfoy. Today will be the day that we remember for the rest of our lives...


End file.
